Confidence: To Date You Must Not Be Shy
Confidence: To Date You Must Not Be Shy
There is shy, and then there is SHY. You can certainly date if you are shy. Getting to where the two of you could possibly go in your relationship is just harder if you are shy. Make your shyness work for you. Challenge your shyness. Not all at once, but a little at a time. If your date knows you are shy to begin with, which is fairly hard to miss in most shy people, you already have a free pass going for you so use it to advantage.
Pushing Your Comfort Zone
Lack of confidence is not nerves. Nerves are ok. Nerves are a good thing. Every journey begins with one step, it is the confidence needed to take that first step that is the big thing.
When You Go, Go Big
As you go about your day, go on being confident in areas where you feel confident. This will give you the boost you’ll need when you get to a task you’re not so sure about. When you get to an area where you are not confident give it a shot, but do it with confidence. You may have to push yourself but “man/woman-up” and go for it. If you flame out, do it with style and be sure to admit it loud and clear that you at least gave it a shot and did it with style. In all likelihood, you and your date will be impressed that you are confident enough with whom you are to fail and to fail with style.
Confidence in Dating is Mostly Preparation
There is a fine line between admitting that you are afraid of something and common sense. If you are afraid of something, there is no reason not to admit that you are afraid and not do it. A person of any substance has fears. They are there to protect you and you should be aware them.
Common sense says, do not do this, it may physically or emotionally hurt you. If, however, reasonable precautions have been taken saying you are afraid and doing it anyway demonstrates that you have confidence in yourself and the precautions.
Dating is much the same thing. You have sensed the date will say yes to a date by engaging the potential date in conversation. A precaution has been taken. There is a perception that they may say no. You ask anyway facing the fear of rejection. Your confidence has been proven. Do the same prep work for a date and confidence will build until you need less prep work.
A Philosophical Point of View
You were born into this world not knowing anything and scared of everything. You learned what you can and should not do to protect yourself and why. When did you think you supposedly stopped learning what you should or should not do and why. Not being confident in dating will, likely, not kill you. Sure you may scrape your psyche every once and a while but when was the last time you shaved a leg or face with a dry razor. You could have been hurt and likely have been. But you got better and will likely do it again, but with a bit more preparation and confidence.